ITS THE SONS OF SPARDA! Sexy no jutsu style
by JediKnightNightTerra
Summary: Our favorite half demons get an unexpected visit from me...Sorry, readers. This isn't supposed to be a oneshot. So, expect updates from me. Note: I accidently put this as a oneshot...
1. Chapter 1

Hey, it's a me again, your favorite …I don't know writer. I'm sick right now, so if this oneshot isn't funny, you can-

Voice: Don't you dare…

Oops…Sorry, I'm cranky, I'm moody, and I've had a bad week. So, excuse my little outburst here and get on with the fic…

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HOLY SH**!!! IT'S THE SONS OF SPARDA!!! Naruto sexy no jutsu style…

Here are our "Heroes' expectations…

Dante: He wants to get all the women he could get.

Vergil: Wants ultimate "Power"…

Nero: ….Wants to be a….FEMALE supermodel…*Stifles a laugh*

Okay, on with the fanfiction…

*A deep, scary voice* One day, our heroes decided to do something better with their pathetic, boring lives. Dante is tired of Lady and Trish aggravating him about his diet. And he hasn't been getting paid. (The customers forget to pay him.) Vergil wants MORE power. MORE, MORE, MORE power. A LOT MORE power. Nero decides his life was getting boring and he wishes to do something else than "Devil Hunting". He searches and he searches…AND he finds a fashion magazine. With Hallie Berry on the front. A stupid light bulb flies and hits him head.

"I got it! I will become a female SUPERMODEL!!!!" he shouted. Luckily, no one heard him. THAT WOULD BE EMBARRASSING!!!

Anyway, a creepy brunette girl with a pair of loose high waters on and a super red face and a handkerchief pops up in front of him.

"Your wish can only be…Wait a sec…" She checks her hand book. Her eyes darted across the page. Finally, she smiles happily.

"Your wish can only be granted if you say the magic word." She said. Nero smiled happily.

"Okay! Is it…Demons?"

"God no!"

"Morons of Wallstreet?"

"No-Hey! That's a good band name! Thanks!"

She disappeared.

"Crap…" he cursed.

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Well, hope you liked it!

Voice: I didn't...

No one asked you...

Sorry, Gotta go. Please review!


	2. Chapter 2

Hey, it a me…The retarded spoof/drama betareader!!!!

Voice: Oh please….

Shut it! No one asked you!

Voice: Duh. I was just expressing my "opinion" about you.

Sorry, I talk to myself too much…Hehhehhehhehhehheh….

Voice: She owns nothing…Not even her sanity…

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Nero sulked in his little emo corner. He wasn't expecting the brunette girl to show up…again.

"What do you want?" he muttered. The girl sits in front of him.

"Okay, Emo Fabio. You want to be a "Female" supermodel, right?" she asked. He perked up immediately after she said, "female".

"Yeah?" he looked like an excited brat about to get the toy he always wanted.

"I know someone who can get you what you want. His name is Naruto Usimaki and he's a ninja." She smiled evillishly.

"Where can I find him?" he asked. She pointed east.

"Konaha Leaf Village. Several miles that way."

He cheered like a little kid. "Yahooo!" She disappeared again.

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She appeared before a brooding Vergil. He had that face of I-wanna-kill-something-so-bad-it-hurts. She smiled half heartedly.

"What's your wish? I might be able to grant it for ya." She winked. He looked down at her. "Seriously?" he had the same friggin' expression Nero had. She nodded.

"Yep. Just go to a village called "Konaha Leaf Village" and find a blond spiky haired ninja named Naruto Usimaki." She pointed east.

He cheered happily…WORSE than Nero. "Thank you!!!!" He yelled. She nodded and disappeared…again.

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Dante sulked like the little brat he was. The girl appeared before him. He was shirtless, so she had to turn away in disgust.

"Geez, you freak. Put a friggin' shirt on." She stuck her tongue out at him. He got up and walked toward her.

"Wow, you're kind of cute." He said. She stared up at him with one eyebrow raised.

"Mister, do you know how old I am?" she asked. He tapped his chin and stuck his finger up after coming up with an idea.

"Eighteen?" he said excitedly. She shook her head.

"NO, you idiot. I'm fourteen." She spat. He sweatdropped. "Pedophile…" she muttered.

"N-no! I'm not a ped! I'm not!" he protested. She chuckled. "Whatever, you pedophile." She teased. He passed out from tiredness and…well, me commanding him to.

~Minutes later~

He woke up with a sticky note on his head. He read it and smiled. It read,

Dear Retarded Devil Hunter,

I know how you can get all the women you want. Go east to the Konaha Leaf Village in China or Japan or wherever it's located. Go and meet with Naruto Usimaki who is a blond haired ninja with an orange jumpsuit. Please, for the love of God, do NOT go anywhere near Tsunade, she might punch you into next week…AND then some. Please be on your best behavior.

Random Genie Brunette Girl or Noah

He smiled like the happy pervert he is.

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Things are about to get bumpy. HANG ON!!!! Please review, and I hope you enjoyed.


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